Dual Personality

I haven’t written in my blog for a while and I honestly missed it like crazy. There is something that I used to do here that I yearned for the most and it’s my “Thought Too Long For Twitter.” Sometimes 140 characters is nowhere near enough to describe what I’m thinking about on a certain topic. Time to bring it back!

Today was an absolute frenzy in the NBA in regards to where people are going, staying, supposed to go, and totally forgotten and I got some thoughts on them. I’m sure I’m wrong about what I think, but its all good. Just gotta let it out.

1. Shane Battier to sign with the Miami Heat

• This was the first move of the prolonged off-season. I hate the Heat. I don’t hide it. The charade that they put on last year kept the taste of drunken puke in my mouth. But, I have to admit that this was one of the best moves they could make.
  
  Finally, someone that has experience, a mature vocal leader that won’t be begging for the ball, and he is not James Jones. No offense to James Jones, but he is as useful on the court as the cardboard of your roll of toilet paper when you use it all up. It doesn’t help you at all and leaves you sitting there, just saying to yourself, “I’m screwed.”

2. Chris Paul to the Lakers and told to go back home to New Orleans

• First of all, on the thought that the Lakers are also trying to make a run at Dwight Howard, this is/was a horrible trade for the Lakers.
  
  Yes, you get one of the best point guards in the world. Yes, you might have squeezed everything that you can get from Pau and Odom. Yes, you are sick and tired of seeing the third best Kardashian sitting behind the Laker bench, while thinking, “How is the sister of someone that we have no idea how she got famous, famous?!”
  
  But the Lakers gave way too much. With no one left on that team, and the track record of Kobe, the bright lights and hecklers of LA might not be enough to make CP3 re-sign for the long haul.
  
  Then the unthinkable happened. The NBA became a scene out of Lord of the Rings. David Stern pulls the best Gandalf impersonation he could, and with all his might belts out, “YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!!” Classic. With all the owners demanding the trade to be stopped like poor little Frodo and Sam, Stern takes on the Balrog of a trade down, while the trade takes him down with it. All the Commish can say to the owners is, “Run! You fools!”
  
  People came up in arms and said that Stern was stopping an imminent champion LakeShow team from forming. I, on the other hand, think that he saved the Lakers from themselves.

3. Tyson Chandler to sign with the New York Knicks

• Tyson Chandler had a monster of a playoffs last year. After years of being in the same sentence as Eddy Curry, he finally showed what he can bring to a team that is on the verge of greatness.
  
  But the Knicks pulled all the trigger thinking that they have no chance of going after CP3 as he seemed to be heading towards Hollywood. Now, things seem to be a little different.
  
  Is Tyson Chandler a good player? Yes. Is he worth a huge contract? Not in the least. The Knicks are one player away from being a title contender, and Chandler just ain’t it.

4. Sebastian Telfair to sign with the Phoenix Suns

• Stop the press! The Suns have a verbal agreement with Sebastian Telfair! Riiiiight. Someone shoot me now. As a Suns fan, I’m wondering, “I’d be happier with Gabe Norwood or Sol Mercado.” In all seriousness, I would rather have either of those two in a Suns jersey than Bassy.
  
  Remembering what Eddie Murphy said in his stand-up titled, Raw, “What have you don’t for me, lately?” Nothing. Telfair has been all hype. He hasn’t done anything in the league and now he will be continuing that, wearing my favorite teams’ jersey, riding the bench.